Ham Really Got a Cruddy Deal

January 5th, 2009

Reading: Genesis 9-10 and Matthew 4

I'm sure that I'm probably not reading the 9th Chapter of the book of Genesis correctly, but it appears that Noah got himself drunk. Apparently, he got so stinking plastered that he didn't have time to put on his clothes. Apparently, Noah's wife Joan (kidding!) was no where to be found in this part of the story (for some reason, not kidding about that).

So here's Ham, minding his own business, trying not to get into trouble, and bam! He sees his father naked. Apparently, some sin was done here, but the Bible doesn't exactly say what. Since there were naked men involved, I'm sure it was something bad. It can't be just seeing someone's nakedness, because they probably saw each other naked many times on that cramped Noah's Ark. I'm sure they had a Men's Locker rooms with showers, or they could have just taken their clothes off and went dancing in the rain. (That's a Ricky Martin allusion for those without ears to hear.)

Yes, it sounds like I am rooting for Ham. However, I'll go on a little faith and assume that whatever Ham did that was worth a curse was justly bestowed. I guess what bothers me was how the story of Noah ends.

Noah had done the will of God, built an Ark, and used it to save the world. God puts a rainbow in the sky, all the animals depart, and it was the perfect happy ending. Considering that Noah and his family were the only ones on planet Earth to have any problem of any kind, it absolutely sucks that he didn't use this new start.

Yes, Noah shouldn't have got drunk in the first place. Why did he get drunk? Most alcoholics turn to the demon in the bottle because they are disappointed with what the world had given them, but I just don't see how Noah, who was given a whole new world, could be so despondent. Maybe he had the "survivor's remorse" that you hear about. It affects people from war-torn countries who saw everyone but themselves die. I suppose that Noah probably had the ultimate survivor's remorse, as he was the only human left besides his family.

Still, after that deluge, where man gets a fresh chance to try again at Eden, Noah's first act as leader of the new world is to establish a curse. Just think what a world it would be now if Noah's first act was to forgive his son for...whatever the hell he did.

Then again, I think we all know that humanity is pretty much incapable of making decisions for the good of the planet, as demonstrated by Adam. The flood may have taken away the evil, but it was still there even with its lone survivor.

This is why Jesus had to be tested in Matthew 4. If Jesus had failed any one of those tests that satan threw at him out in the wilderness, it would have been Adam and Noah's aftermath all over again. A failed test would have proven that Jesus was just as fallen as any of us, and unworthy of taking a curse worse than the one bestowed on Ham.

I can't imagine how bad it was for Jesus. The Bible only records three tests, but if he was out in the wilderness for 40 days and nights without food, I'm sure it felt like three hundred. All this was done so there would be a great light, and all curses, even the ones uttered by drunken men, will be completely vanquished.

So, yeah, I think Ham really got a cruddy deal, but all of us are under a curse until Jesus breaks it.